The World According To Moose

The wife and I live next door to two lesbians. It was my birthday coming up and they kindly asked me what I would like as a gift. Very quietly, so as not to sound too cheeky, I told them . . . . I was quite surprised when they gave me a Rolex. It [...]

GORDON Brown last night dismissed calls to surrender his £123,000 a year pension when he is forced to stop being prime minister next June. Mr Brown was defiant in the face of City outrage despite the UK government’s annual operating loss of £100bn, rising to £1.5 trillion when the write-down of its banking assets is [...]

Cristiano Ronaldo escaped unharmed after writing of his Ferrari – rumours are that he dived from the car before it hit the barrier! The first thing he said to the police was that the wall was not 10 yards away! Alex Ferguson, meanwhile, is claiming that the Ferrari does not give Ronaldo enough protection. Witnesses [...]

For UK readers substitute President for Prime Minister. A little boy goes to his dad and asks, ‘What is Politics?’ Dad says, ‘Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I am the head of the family, so call me The President. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call [...]