The World According To Moose » Religion

An Open Letter to Laura Schlesinger

Moose — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 19:07:58 +0000

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a US man, and posted on the Internet. It’s funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them
that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination … End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this? Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some
wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep
with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I’m confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman,
Ed.D. Professor Emeritus,
Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education
University of Virginia

PS (It would be a damn shame if we couldn’t own a Canadian)

A Testament To God

Moose — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 16:54:27 +0000

Dr Laura Schlesigner is a highly regarded US radio personality. On her radio show recently she said that as an observant and faithful orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination, according to Leviticus 18:22. The following is a response letter to her.:

Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her? (she can read and write)
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify?
Why can’t I own Canadians? Aren’t all men equal?
I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself? Do you know of a good stoning parlour?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination – Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? – Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

I look forward to your comments and advice.

Best Regards.

James Brown.

No Faith In Education

Moose — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:26:47 +0000

My eldest daughter started secondary school last week. Not the school we would have preferred, not the nearest and not the school where all her friends were going.
The reason we could not get our preferred choice is that over the last 2-3 years neither myself or Mrs Moose has gone to church. You see, our nearest school is what’s called a ‘faith school’ and the governors, with the help of the local church, set the admission policy and will openly discriminate against children whose parents don’t go to church.
‘But it’s a faith school, doesn’t the church pay the running costs?’ I hear you say. I used to think so, but the answer is no. You (as a taxpayer) pay. Faith schools are state funded for 80-90% of the costs and that means YOU and ME!
You hear a lot these days about racism, sexism and ageism but not so much about ‘faithism’ which is just as deplorable. The church talks it up big about inclusion, forgiveness and community spirit, and if I was to go down to the local church this Sunday morning I wouldn’t mind betting I would be welcomed with open arms and encouraged to attend more. BUT, if my children want to attend their local school they are denied. Not because of their parents faith but on the evidence of church attendance (trust me, the two are not mutually inclusive).
I therefore conclude that faith schools are nothing but a recruitment tool for the church.
We are constantly told of the dangers of global warming and are encouraged to walk to school and avoid the high polluting school-run but all the time kids who live miles away get priority over my local school. There are actually some people who must pass up to four other schools to get to ours.
In Northern Ireland they have learnt that segregating children on the basis of their parents faith is probably not the best thing and are taking steps to set up community schools like there used to be here.
You would not exclude children from a school over the colour of their skin and I don’t see why religion should be any different.
Religion in churches and education in schools – it is that simple!

A Knock On My Door

Moose — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 18:16:14 +0000

I had a knock on my door the other day and discovered the ‘creationists’ were in town. I was presented with a story book titled the Bible and informed that the Earth was about 5000 years old and the story of Genesis was undeniably true because it was the word of God.

Ever since I had a Mormon bloke come round, a few years ago, introducing himself as ‘Elder Berry’ (I found it funny but he didn’t), I have always liked to have a bit of harmless fun with these people. Now please don’t get wrong if you have a belief and/or a faith, that is your right and I will fight for you to have that right, but, please, don’t expect me to welcome those beliefs when I was having such a peaceful morning in the sun. I simply asked if ‘Adam had a belly button?’ She was puzzled but said she presumed so. I then explained that he must have been born rather than created, you know, the umbilical cord and all that. I also asked how a whole race of billions of humans could have derived from just one couple. Apparently the Bible doesn’t explain everything and I must have faith.

My faith was restored when she buggered off!

Since this episode I have been searching for the answer to life, the universe and everything (I know it’s 42) and have at last found something worthy of my belief and faith. I have become a ‘Pastafarian’ and now worship ‘The Flying Spaghetti Monster’. It would appear that it is He who created the world and I am now glad I have been touched by his noodly appendage.

For more information please visit The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and for God’s sake please keep an open mind and accept the site for what it is.

Catholic Church vs Democracy

Moose — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:56:48 +0000

The Catholic Church is calling for Gordon Brown to allow a free vote on the latest bill to do with stem cell research using embryos. Personally I believe all votes in parliament should be free but this is not what the church is saying. What they actually want is for MP’s to vote with their consience, in other words by their religion. My local MP is their to represent his constituents and not his religion. How on earth is this democracy?

MP’s should consult people who are experts in this field and then only vote once they are more informed on the subject. This is democracy!

The church used to play a part in politics many years ago and it was called the ‘dark ages’ for a reason. The world is not flat and we do not imprison men of science any more. Most of us listen and learn from them, unless of course God has told us otherwise.